--- title: "Bible verses for the loss of a child" description: "One passage that does not try to account for anything, the two verses most often brought to bereaved parents, and where the angel phrase came from." url: "https://biblenudge.com/blog/bible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child" lang: "en" published: "2025-10-05" modified: "2025-10-05" author: "Cal Hewitt" tags: ["grief","loss of a child","stillbirth","infant loss","bereaved parents","psalm 34"] image: "https://biblenudge.com/og/blog-bible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child.jpg" alternates: es: "https://biblenudge.com/es/blog/versiculos-para-la-perdida-de-un-hijo.md" --- # Bible verses for the loss of a child [Cal Hewitt](https://biblenudge.com/about/cal-hewitt)Published October 5, 2025 - grief - loss of a child - stillbirth - infant loss - bereaved parents - psalm 34 ![Bible verses for the loss of a child](https://biblenudge.com/blog/bible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child/featured.jpg) [Psalm 34:18](https://biblenudge.com/context/psalm-34-18) is one sentence with two halves, and there is no third half in which it accounts for what happened. It locates God beside a broken heart, and then it stops. Almost everything else said to a bereaved parent is an attempt at an explanation of some kind, which is what makes a sentence that does not attempt one worth having. Psalm 34:18. In the King James: > Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. > The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit. ## The short version ### It explains nothing Psalm 34:18 says where God is when a heart is broken. It does not say why, it does not say for how long, and it does not ask what happened. ### Rachel refuses to be comforted [Jeremiah 31:15](https://biblenudge.com/context/jeremiah-31-15) is the one passage where a mother’s refusal to be consoled is recorded without being corrected. It is usually quoted without verses 16 and 17. ### The angel line is not Scripture It is not in any passage, and [Hebrews 2:16](https://biblenudge.com/context/hebrews-2-16) tells against it. Bereavement research records it among the things parents were told that did not help. ### The traditions disagree On what happens to a child who dies, Rome and the Lutherans say different things, and both of them say hope rather than revealed certainty, in writing. ## Rachel refuses to be comforted There is a passage in Jeremiah where a mother refuses to be comforted and the text lets the refusal stand. > A voice is heard in Ramah, lamentation and bitter weeping, Rachel weeping for her children. She refuses to be comforted for her children, because they are no more. Jeremiah 31:15. Nobody in the text tells her to stop. It is set during a deportation, and Rachel is long dead by then, so the picture is of a mother weeping over children being taken away centuries after her own death. The refusal is put in the book as it stands. The next two verses are almost always missing when this gets quoted, and they change the shape without canceling verse 15: > Refrain your voice from weeping, and your eyes from tears; for your work will be rewarded. They will come again from the land of the enemy. There is hope for your latter end. Your children will come again to their own territory. That is spoken to a people about a return from exile. [Matthew 2:18](https://biblenudge.com/context/matthew-2-18) later quotes verse 15 on its own, about the children killed at Bethlehem, and stops there. Two writers using the same line for two different things, one of them keeping the answer and one of them not. ![A made bed with one side undisturbed, morning light across it](https://biblenudge.com/blog/bible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child/where-the-reader-is.jpg) ## 2 Samuel 12:23, and whether it promises you will see them again [2 Samuel 12:23](https://biblenudge.com/context/2-samuel-12-23) is David, after the death of his infant son, explaining why he has stopped fasting: > But now he is dead, why should I fast? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me. Read what surrounds it. His servants are confused, because he wept while the child was ill and got up and ate when the child died. What he says is that while there was a chance he asked, and now there is not. The sentence is used as proof that you will see your child again. It may mean that. It is one man, speaking about himself, in a sentence that is mostly about why he is no longer fasting, and it is not a doctrine being taught. If it helps, take it. It is worth knowing how thin the ground is when somebody hands it to you as a settled fact. ## Where “God needed another angel” came from Not from Scripture. There is no passage in which people become angels, and none in which God needs one. The nearest text runs the other way: Hebrews 2:16 says he does not give help to angels but to the offspring of Abraham. It is recorded, though, in the research on what bereaved parents were told. A study of parents’ experiences [lists “God wanted another angel”](https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10838468/) among the things said to them that did not help. A bereaved mother writes that she was told “God needed one more little angel, so He chose yours,” and that [several cards said the same](https://www.silentgriefsupport.com/stop-saying-this-to-grieving-parents-please/). [Romans 8:28](https://biblenudge.com/context/romans-8-28) is Scripture, and it says “all things work together for good for those who love God.” It does not say everything happens for a reason, which is not a verse at all. The same study records attempts to explain the death through God’s role as unhelpful to the parents on the receiving end of them. ## What the traditions say about where your child is You may be asking where your child is. The traditions do not answer with one voice, and the two below are worth reading in their own words. The Vatican’s International Theological Commission concluded in 2007 that there are [“serious theological and liturgical grounds for hope”](https://www.vatican.va/roman_curia/congregations/cfaith/cti_documents/rc_con_cfaith_doc_20070419_un-baptised-infants_en.html) that unbaptised infants who die are saved, and it says plainly that this is hope rather than revealed certainty. It also records that limbo was a theological hypothesis and never defined doctrine. The Lutheran Church, Missouri Synod says there is [“some basis for the hope”](https://www.lcms.org/about/beliefs/faqs/doctrine?theme=dark%2F1000) that God works faith in children who die without baptism, by a method not revealed. Both of those say hope. Somebody who tells you they know is saying more than their own church does. ![A window with rain on it, the room behind out of focus](https://biblenudge.com/blog/bible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child/what-people-say.jpg) ## What parents say From Reddit's [r/babyloss](https://www.reddit.com/r/babyloss/comments/1hduiwl), on being asked how many children you have: “I wish it wasn’t a complicated thing for me just to answer the simple question of how many kids I have.” From the same thread: “He was stillborn and he was beautiful and perfect and so so very loved.” And: “It’s my life. I can’t be ashamed of any of it.” “How many children do you have” is the ordinary question that stops having an ordinary answer, and it arrives without warning, from people who mean nothing by it. There is no correct version of the answer, and nobody is owed the long one. ## The first year, and looking after yourself in it The first year after a child dies carries a measured increase in risk, and it is worth knowing as something that may apply to you rather than as a fact about bereaved parents in general. A Danish study following 83,659 people who had lost a child found, in that first year, a combined risk difference of [18.9 events per 1,000 people](https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5428185/) for suicide, deliberate self-harm and psychiatric illness together, compared with people who had not been bereaved. Risk was highest in the first year and fell after it. That is a combined figure across three outcomes in one country’s registry, and it does not predict what happens to any one person. What it does say is that if you are not safe, this is common enough to have been counted, and it is not a failure. In the United States, call or text 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. Outside the US, [Find A Helpline](https://findahelpline.com) lists services by country. If somebody is in immediate danger, call your emergency number. ## Where to go next [Psalm 34:18 is here with the verses either side](https://biblenudge.com/context/psalm-34-18), along with the King James reading. The [grief page](https://biblenudge.com/resources/grief) covers the wider ground, and there is a piece on [grief that comes back months later](https://biblenudge.com/blog/grief-that-comes-back-months-later) for the part that arrives after everyone else has moved on. [Bible Nudge](https://biblenudge.com/) takes a sentence in your own words, and it will say so plainly if it has nothing close. [Find a passage](https://biblenudge.com/nudge). ## Words that come up here Tap a term to see what it means. **Ramah.** The town in [Jeremiah 31:15](https://biblenudge.com/context/jeremiah-31-15) where the weeping is heard. It was a staging point where captives were gathered before being taken into exile, which is what makes the verse a picture of children being taken away. **Limbo.** A medieval theological hypothesis about where unbaptised infants go. The Vatican’s 2007 study records that it was never defined doctrine. **Stillbirth.** A death before or during birth, after a threshold that differs by country. It is a bereavement, and organizations like Sands exist because for a long time it was not treated as one. **Rainbow baby.** A child born after a loss. The term is common among bereaved parents and it is theirs; it is not a description anybody else should apply for them. ## Share this page If somebody you know is carrying this, the link goes straight to the passage and what surrounds it. Nothing here asks them to sign up for anything. [Facebook](https://www.facebook.com/sharer/sharer.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fbiblenudge.com%2Fblog%2Fbible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child)[Pinterest](https://pinterest.com/pin/create/button/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fbiblenudge.com%2Fblog%2Fbible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child&media=https%3A%2F%2Fbiblenudge.com%2Fblog%2Fbible-verses-for-the-loss-of-a-child%2Ffeatured.jpg&description=Bible%20verses%20for%20the%20loss%20of%20a%20child) ## Related Articles - [What to Say to Someone Who Lost a Child: Their Child's Name, the Years After, and the People Who Came](https://biblenudge.com/blog/what-to-say-to-someone-who-lost-a-child): Messages to send today, a verse for the card, what bereaved parents say helped and hurt, and saying their child's name for years to come. - [How to Forgive Someone Who Hurt You: What the Bible Says, What Psychologists Separate, and Psalm 34:18 for the Hurt](https://biblenudge.com/blog/how-to-forgive-someone-who-hurt-you): Forgiving, trusting and going back are separate decisions. What psychologists and traditions say, and Psalm 34:18 for a night the hurt returns. - [When Your Teenager Was at a Shooting: What to Do in the First Days, What to Say, and Psalm 34:18 for a Broken Heart](https://biblenudge.com/blog/when-your-teenager-was-at-a-shooting): A teenager who was at the birthday party in a Macon, Georgia park, or who knows someone who was? What to do in the first days, where to call, and Psalm 34:18 to read.